Officially Outsourced

I was so nervous about the job opportunity that I was staying up late to read books that would help me feel more prepared. I had a collection-- marking the chapters as I studied and adding colorful tabs on the items I expected I would need to reference. I read articles online, cruised websites, and asked professionals.

I consulted with friends who had done the job before and had a list of standard questions.

What surprised you the most about your experience with this job?
What was the most challenging part?
What was the best part?
What advice would you give a person just starting out?

I received varied answers on all of the questions, except one.

For those who felt they had been successful, the question "What was the best part?" was met with the same kind of answer--an answer that exuded a heavenly kind of bliss that made my desire grow even stronger.

I decided I was going to do it, and I was going to do it well.

Once I met the requirements for the position, I began putting into practice the tips and advice I had gathered. I purchased equipment and tools that would help me to increase my efficiency. I clocked my time with precision and found creative ways to ensure my success. Only a few days in, and my drive to continue was challenged.

It wasn't easy, it wasn't fun, and it seemed never-ending. Mr. H told me he would support me if I chose to quit. I thought about the pros and cons. I cried and wondered if I could do what I was convinced I had been born to do.

I made phone calls for professional advice, tried techniques to improve my performance, and never gave up. I worked through the most challenging days and weeks of the experience, and before I knew it--I was on a roll. I designated apart of our apartment to be my 'work station', and I thrived on the satisfaction of accomplishment and fulfillment the job offered me. The best part was watching my son grow as I did my best to reach my goals with this job.

It has now been 16 1/2 months since I took on the job, and what a fulfilling adventure! I would not trade the early mornings or late nights for anything in the world. I have learned so much about myself, my identity, and strength I never knew I had. I have conquered uncomfortable situations, battled stares, and defended my passion for this glorious work.

This morning, I received a letter from my boss.

It read:

"Thank you for all you have done over the past 16 months. Your client is strong, happy, and healthy because of a job well done. Your services will no longer be needed in this department. You have been outsourced to a bean. Good luck in all of your future endeavors."

Outsourced To A Bean.
A SOY bean, that is.

So, you may ask: "What was the best part?"

Sharing those quiet, time-stands-still moments with the most important little person in the world, right there in my arms--and I was providing the purest nourishment on the earth...just for him.

Breastfeeding has been an amazing journey for me, I am grateful for the drive that kept me going & for the many who served as helpful 'professionals' along the way. The experience has changed and enhanced who I am, and brought me closer to who I am trying to be.

Until further notice...

...this milk maid is unavailable for business.


Emily said...

A beautiful ode to a beautiful do it justice. Thank you and good luck in this next chapter of J's life!

Linda said...

Are you's over????? You did good. I am really proud of you.
It is a very sweet and good thing...quite amazing when you think of it. What a system! I hope he isn't allergic to soy! well, I guess you already know he isn't!

Linda said...

OK, now I am going to go soak some soybeans. That made me want some soymilk!

Anonymous said...

i was lost through this whole post until i got to the end.. LOVE IT!

jennie b said...

What a wonderful (and humorous) description! It's so hard to put the experience into words. As always, you have done it perfectly.