Reflecting On My Day

At the end of a busy day

it's still Monday?, I ask myself as I notice I already devoured the Toblerone deliciousness that I bought to last me all week

I love to sit down and think about the things accomplished, goals met, to-do's I was able to cross off, lessons learned, make a new mental list of to-do's, chastise myself for what I did NOT do, resolve to do better, and record a few lines of it all in my journal if I'm not too tired.

Mama bear & cubs                                     {June 2013}

Today started about 8:30 with the boys running in together requesting their oatmeal breakfast. I encouraged them to take advantage of the last two bananas while I took a few minutes to push the grog out of my brain and then we were up and running (anyone who knows me, knows I am not a morning person and do not do well with jumping out of bed as soon as I wake up).

We did breakfast, bricks, coloring, clothes, soap, teeth, towels, pbs kids, scanning the bunny ears for a non-pixelated version for pbs kids, laundry in, laundry out, clean clothes picked out of the clean laundry piles (you would not believe the mountain of clean laundry on our guest bed right this very moment), sent some emails, made a call or two, cleaned up from breakfast, printed a shopping list/weekly schedule, sent a text, put someone in time out, hopped in the shower (behind schedule, as usual), found word world on hulu, cut up some apples, discussed changing the world with a friend, got the princess up & fed & dressed, everyone out the door (finally!) to run some errands (my friend too!), first stop, second stop, back home, unloading, ice cream sandwiches melting, discussing dinosaurs, kids play outside, honkity honk honk their horns, Miss N down for nap, neighbor comes over & asks my kids names (more than 5x during her visit), my friend hugs & leaves, get the mail, instagram a photo of J with his first birthday card for his big 5, back inside to whip up a dinner (plus a box to share), kid play in mud, I play in creamy enchiladas, kids in the tub after muddy play, I label all the dishes & wake up the sleeping babe, shoes back on, out the door, delivery & chat with a new friend, stop at a lake for photos to turn in for a class, realize I left my memory card in my Mac, really!? decide to just stay & let kids play at the park, listen to amusing conversations between Mr. J and the rest, watch Miss N's glee as she climbs all by herself, take note of Mr. N's resilience and defensive stance, meet a fellow park family, share cookies & milestones, load 'em up again, home, unload, back in the tub, drinks, teeth, stories, scriptures, prayers, cuddles, pillows, hugs, lights out, laundry movin', dishes washin', de-humidifier hummin'...the motion slows and it's just me and my thoughts.

I tried to form a picture of what I was feeling (to share on the ultimate feeling-sharing place in all of the world--facebook, of course --*rolls eyes at self*) and this is what I ended up with :

"From the first awakening squeaks to the last nighttime pleas for 'just one more minute'--a mother's roller-coaster style work is full of happy, heartwarming ups and mundane, messy downs. (And those words don't even begin to truly capture it) Every day we get on, buckle up, and ride again--convinced that the brilliant views we enjoy at the tops of the ups far outweigh the shaking, loud, rumbling chaos of the lows. 



When my house is still and quiet (laundry rumbling, dishwasher swirling, house put back together again), I step off the roller coaster and I review my day's journey from a much calmer vantage point. The fantastic ups feel brighter and the frantic downs seem less dramatic; in those memory catching moments, my heart swells with gratitude for the chance to ride along."

Mama moments. Shoes on.                         {June 2013}

11.11.11

Today students will have fun writing the date on their school work.


Today many babies will be born & have a fantastic birthday.


Today many marriages will begin with a rockin' anniversary date.


Today "eleven" is the coolest word.


Today my brother Ben will enjoy his 11.11.11 birthday--which I hope is perfect!


Today I celebrated by marching around the living room rug to the beats of pandora radio...on the heels of my full-speed-ahead 3 year old. (Morning dance party, anyone?)

11.11.11

Today

Today many servicemen & women 

will be remembered, honored, and thanked 

for their sacrifices

on our behalves.

I add my remembrance, honor, and gratitude.

Today & every day.

Alone

Yesterday I went grocery shopping/errand running by myself.


In case you missed that last part...I was by myself.

Alone. 

Solo mio.

Since the Mr. is gone most Monday thru Fridays, I do most of my errand running with two small sidekicks. I really can't complain too much, since they are 1)adorable, 2) mostly quite well-behaved, and 3) mine.

However, there is something to be said about going out & shopping/browsing without extra responsibilities.

And that something?

It is heavenly.

I was able to process my thoughts in one long stream of consciousness (instead of juggling my thoughts + 3 year old's questions + 1 year old's squealing requests), which was relaxing in and of itself. I was able to choose which stores to go to based on my interests (instead of which ones had the 5 point harness side-by-side carts for extra travelers). I was able to browse at a snails pace (instead of weaving my way around the isles in an effort to avoid certain displays or distractions)...and I did.


I noticed other conversations as they passed me by and wondered if others did the same when I was walking around in almost-constant conversation with my little guys. I noticed the tired Mom who walked past me and the toddler who couldn't handle another minute in his seat. I noticed the hard work of the store's employees and the holiday scents wafting around in glistening glee. I noticed sparkly things that would likely have lured me in...before saving for big wish list items became such a priority.


It was fascinating, all the noticing I was able to do...even in the parking lot. I noticed those carts out of place (pet peeve, oh yes it is), puddles on the ground, and then out of the corner of my eye I noticed something else. A piece of red, rustling in the wind on the next car over. I looked and my heart melted. 

A red rose, tucked lovingly 

under the driver's side windshield wiper.

I smiled. And *may have* teared up a bit.

Such a simple thing...a lone red rose. The recipient would surely be surprised when he/she found it, and the giver was likely anxious to receive contact once it was discovered. I imagined a couple...madly in love...or perhaps it was an apology gift after a short-tempered disagreement. Or maybe it was a guy crushing on a girl who was oblivious. The giver will never know the moment I enjoyed while glancing at their gift exchange...or the memories it exploded in my own heart.

I thoroughly enjoyed those minutes smiling in my car...

... given to me by a lone rose

on an afternoon that I was out and about, alone.

Superstar Medleys

Last night our baby boy woke up just about the time we had finished cleaning the kitchen and straightening the living room. We were ready & excited to watch the latest episode of The Sing Off...but those little cries demanded attention. I sent the SuperDad down to check on him, give him some water, and lay him back down. 


Obediently, SuperDad followed my instructions--but baby boy was not convinced that it was time for him to be sleeping. I could tell that the little guy wasn't going to make this easy so I asked SuperDad to bring him upstairs. I thought maybe he was teething and needed some extra attention or maybe...just maybe he knew we were about to watch some awesome a cappella performances and he didn't want to miss out.

Do you watch The Sing Off? 

You should.

Seriously. 

This was one of my favorite performances from the episode (Queen medley).

Our favorite,  BYU's Vocal Point shows off their skills in this Elvis medley: Awesome.

Or, sit down & just watch the whole episode HERE.

I held little man for a bit and then felt overheated by babies (the bump is taking up more room than ever and baby boy just sprawls his soft-skinned limbs all over the place when he's tired), so I passed him off to SuperDad. He squirmed and wriggled out of those arms and back into mine. He turned his head from one side to the next until he found the perfect spot...nestled on my chest with his head perfectly cradled by my neck. His little body draped over the side, he seemed to be cuddling with his unborn sister.


As we sat there with the glow of the screen in the corner of the room, listening to fabulously arranged superstar medleys, the three of us cozy on the couch--the sweetness of the moment hit me. I was holding my littlest boy in my arms, my sweet baby girl cuddled perfectly inside, and SuperDad by my side. 

These are moments that never come back...

...unless we write them down...

our own superstar medley of memories.

Short Term Memory

I had forgotten...

about the late nights,
rooster-early mornings,
and spit up fountains.

I had forgotten...

about the late night cuddles,
sweet baby breath,
and soft silken skin.

I had forgotten...

about the messes of poo,
the wide-mouth cries,
and my body misshapen.

I had forgotten...

about the magical gazes,
the warm hand holding,
and feeling of heaven.

I had forgotten...

what it was like to fall in love all over again.


**Special thanks to Baby N, for reminding me of what I had forgotten**

Did I spend enough time outside this summer?

Outside

Sitting

On my covered patio.

Laptop

Resting

In the folding chair.

Trees

Blowing

In the September breeze.

Birds

Dancing

Perfect choreography

Leaves,

Falling

One by one...by one

Clouds,

Hovering

Making familiar shapes

Flowers,

Whispering

Secrets as they wink at me.

Summer

Wrapped

In a box to pack away

Fall

Arriving

Minute by minute...by minute

Winter

Waiting

Around the corner

Toddler

Snoring

In the quiet room

Husband

Whistling

In his little car

Yesterday

Calling

To ask me if I remember

Today

Insisting

I breathe it all in

Tomorrow

Asking

Are you smiling?

~sjh.09.15.09

Thankful Thursday: September 10th

Why, hello!

Happy Thursday to YOU.

Today's Thankful Thursday is brought to you by aspen trees.

Tall, graceful, white-barked aspen trees. There are a few of these ladies that wait patiently every day for me to open my blinds to say hello. Their jazz-hand-leaves remind me that I'm far from home (no aspens in TN or KY!), but their stalwart stance reaffirms my mantra that I can 'bloom where I am planted'. And I love 'em for it!

The tall aspens' glowing influence unwittingly reminds Mr. H of his love for the far away land called Utah, and they bring back sweet-and-soggy memories of a camping trip during my summer stay with cousins in Arizona (1993?).

*sigh*

Do Aspens remind you of a time or place?

Or is there another tree that influences your memory files?

I'm thankful for those lovely aspens--I can see them from my living room couch & as I type these words.

I'm thankful for special moments over the past week that have reminded me of the magnitude of my mother role. Lemme share a few with you:

-J bringing me his favorite Susan Boynton book, crawling into my lap, and bopping his head as he prods me to read...nay SING the book to him (click here for the version we play regularly for the J, here for more Sandra Boynton fun).

-Taking J to the beach for the first time as a walking person--and watching him decide (ever so slowly) that *maybe* it was ok to have sand between his toes

-J walking up to us after dinner with his ball saying "Ball...?" with that perfect tiny-voice inflection that says "please play with me!"--and deciding to play ball BEFORE cleaning up, just because we CAN!

-J showing an interest in the framed print of Christ on our wall & hearing him say "Jesus" for the very first time ("Dee-sus")

These are just a few...they seem to be happening more & more as J is learning and able to share with me what he wants and through words really help me realize how much he IS LEARNING.

It is in those moments that I feel myself WATCHING from the outside...as a little boy crawls into his Mama's lap, experiences new things with an opinion of his own, asks his parents for some play time, as a little boy starts to recognize & learn about Jesus Christ.

In these moments...I am grateful for the opportunity to be his mother, and I feel compelled to step it up as he is ready to learn and grow at a faster pace than ever before. I need to make sure to pay attention when he points to the print on the wall so I can use that moment to teach him who our Savior is and how much He loves us.

I need to be willing to put off the routine to enjoy the moment.

I need to be in tune to J's world, so that I can share these moments WITH him, instead of mistakenly pass them by.

I am thankful for the glowing moments this past week that have reminded me of who I want to be.

As I look outside, I see the aspens are nodding in reverence. They feel it too. These days are flying fast & I have to cherish every moment. Each moment is a gift. Each moment is a treasure.

I am thankful.